Metatraining

I went for a run on Friday (20/05/2011). A real run. Outside, in the world…

It didn’t go very well. Or rather, it went very well for the first ten minutes or so. Around about then, however, I noticed a growing pain in my lower back. A mile or so later and the pain started getting worse…

Eventually, I stopped and did some stretches, which alleviated the discomfort to a degree. A hundred metres or so later, however, and it was back – and getting even worse.

More stretches later, I turned around and ran homewards. Infuriatingly, I had to stop every now and then to stretch out my back. Is it me, or is this way too much like being an old man? I mean, seriously? I can’t have run more than 5km and it was like dealing with a war wound!

Not only did I fail to run as far or as fast as I wanted, I also failed to push either my legs or lungs, making the entire exercise pretty pointless.
Having conducted some ‘research’ into the matter, it appears the back pain is likely due to a few things.

1. Bad running technique. Given that I’ve never run anywhere, it’s likely I haven’t really learned to run for an extended period of time without ruining myself. I know, I know – how hard can it be? Still.
2. Bad shoes. I’m no expert (actually I am, but never mind), but I’m pretty sure it isn’t clever to attempt a half marathon in the 6-year old Patrick trainers I purchased for £10 from Sport and Ski in Leeds. Apparently I should do something about this.
3. A weak lower back. Running places pressure on a very specific area of the back, which is rarely otherwise utilised. Once again, my lack of running means I’ve not strengthened these muscles.

In short, it seems I haven’t done enough training yet…so I can’t train. The only way to train, therefore, will be to train for my training. Meta-training. Sounds like bollocks.

Idea number two: pain-killers. Much easier.

Idea number three: work on my lower back, to try to strengthen it:

Routine 1: 22/05/2011
Squats at 100kg
Sumo deadlifts at 100, 140, 160 and 180kg
Glute-ham raises and standing cable ham curls at 20kg (or so).
Back stretches
Hopefully, some more of that will sort me out.

About the Author
Ed Gamester is a silly man who lives in the United Kingdom. He is the harbinger of Ghost Squad, singer of Gay Bum and author of A Rum Run Awry. He fights, kills and dies for TV and films, and gallivants around the place wrestling, drinking and lifting things for glory and profit. Where Ed treads, there stamp the boots of the Guild. Ed does not wear glasses, but feels this photograph makes him look more intelligent and artistically talented than he is. Feel free to contact him: he is disappointingly affable.

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