WOE IS ME. Here is my story for the local newspaper, the Daily Grind: Snow Reason to Panic Bloody disgrace, Lisa. A little bit of snow and the whooooole country grinds to a halt! All over Britain,copywriters like this idiot are taking their 35 year old sports cars down frozen country paths and...
Continue reading ...Today, I turn 26 years of age. Thus is ends; I'm officially too old to buy a Young Person's anything. The best years of my life are now over. In fact, I'm going to head down the road to Wycombe Wanders' football stadium, slip on some spilled beans and claim massive compensation...you know...sue-a-s...
Continue reading ...Today, I went back to my dojo for the first time in months, with one goal in mind - to figure out if my body can still move properly... The good news is that yes, it seems to be functioning just fine after weeks of booze and food and general inactivity. The bad news is that...erm...well, I sup...
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All in all, 2012 was a pretty good year for me. I tried to do at least one kickass thing for every month of the year. Here is what I managed: [gallery type="rectangular" ids="574,1181,932,894,850,1683,2235,1068,2238,1540,1333,981,1131"] Info: this year, I completed Tough Guy Winter 2012, won...
Continue reading ...What better way to start a new year than with a personal best in the gym? How about THREE PERSONAL BESTS IN A ROW? That do anything for ya? That's levitation, Holmes. Nah, only kidding. I didn't fly. What I did, however, was perform my three best sets of squats ever, one after the other. Befor...
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Continue reading ...I wrote a song about Christmas. Well...I say "wrote"...and I say "song"...and I say "Christmas"... ...
Continue reading ...Today's weapons of choice, in the war against...whatever it is I am trying to defeat by spending hours throwing around iron in a gym... ...
Continue reading ...Back in August, I posted this photo of my car, a rare 1977/78 Datsun 260z, which I had just got back on the road. It had just spent 9 weeks in a garage, having £1200 of work done to it, whilst I went through two motorbikes... Then I got it back and took it DRIVIN'! Then my starter motor went and...
Continue reading ...[caption id="attachment_1541" align="aligncenter" width="640"] Squatting in the name of the Lord...[/caption]...
Continue reading ...Whilst the local populace is listening to lonely old men waffle about morality in ostentatious castles built with money extorted from the poor and desperate, my family are drinking morning beer, listening to Iron Maiden and waiting for my uncle to judge our midnight gingerbread house-making competit...
Continue reading ...It has just turned Christmas day, which means many Catholics will be attending midnight mass at this very moment. My own feelings on this event aside, I thought I'd spend a couple of minutes writing about my thoughts on the Christmas in general. Christmas, no matter what they tell you, has nothing ...
Continue reading ...We are still climbing! We seem to be improving too! Of course, we still screw up a lot: [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OxGnkFOJzI&w=560&h=315] Spring is coming, however, and we must be ready to face THE ROCK!!...
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Friends, I have done it! "Done what?", you ask? Why, nothing less than the TEN TON CHALLENGE! Sadly, this is simply something I invented myself and it isn't that hard. Still, it was something to work towards. Essentially, the goal is to shift ten tons of iron in one half-hour long squat session, c...
Continue reading ...[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ma8nDZaFp4k&w=560&h=315] This is the epitome of why new media (or social media, or indeed the world in general) needs to sit on a hundred dicks and cut its own face off. This is what every single news outlet said prior to this performance (and for so...
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Today, I had the pleasure of visiting the Shaolin Temple in Tufnel Park, London, to watch demonstrations of the various forms and arts they teach. I'd be lying if I said I could remember everything they showed (there was a lot) and, to be honest, I'd probably get it wrong if I tried to explain. ...
Continue reading ...It's that time of year again. Time to make the hardest phone call: "Hello, Lolita. Yes, it's me. I know I don't call you very often, but it has been too long and it's getting uncomfortable, especially at night when I'm trying to sleep. I don't know exactly what I'm going to ask you to do, but you'...
Continue reading ...Lying in bed, counting all the shits I don't give and supping on a delicious Whisky All In. Sadly I have no sugar or lemon juice, so I have replaced those ingredients...with a Mars ice cream. I'm pretty sure this is the meaning of life......
Continue reading ...Oh, by the way, I totally did some badminton! Apologies for not letting you know sooner, it slipped my mind because...well...it's badminton. I didn't actually set out to play badminton that day (12.11.2012); I actually drove to Reading Climbing Centre with my brother to use their bouldering wall a...
Continue reading ...FACT: Until you've ripped the ass from your cargo trousers mid-set, you have not squatted like a man. And until you have held in your laughter for long enough to finish the set, you have not learn the discipline necessary...to be a DRAGON SLAYER!! At the gym today, I squatted ten tons in half an h...
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